You Are Here
I am here. We are here.
This image popped into my head this week and I can’t place what prompted it. It’s the image that the folks at the Life Design Studio use to open their training sessions for educators. I remember seeing it in June when I was back in the virtual space as a coach and I have been having lots of conversations about Life Design recently, but none where there was anything to specifically prompt this image. (No one saying “remember that arrow that says you are here*, I mean, that thing is just the best,”* shocking, I know).
I don’t think it’s random. There’s a warm feeling that comes with this image. Memories of feeling engaged, being with like-minded people. There’s an immediate dropping of my shoulders and deep intake of breath. A feeling of focus. Of trusting where I’m being led.
And so I thought I’d share it here, in case you also need a bit of a reminder that
we
are
here.
Which means what exactly? Probably something different to everyone. But here’s what’s feeling relevant to me:
The past can’t be changed. Replaying what happened and thinking about how we might respond in a similar situation in the future is useful and in service of growth, but only if we take the lesson into the present moment without lingering too long in the past replaying scenarios over and over.
The future can’t be controlled. Similarly, trying to predict and prepare for every future possibility is just asking to spiral into worry and dread. It’s not terrible to think through scenarios and try to be prepared, but we have to find a way to bring ourselves back from that to the actual facts of what actually exists in the present. Similarly, goals and plans are great, but only if we’re not holding to them so rigidly that we miss other opportunities right in front of us.
The pause is crucial. To take that deep breath and realize my shoulders have been at my ears for hours. To notice the hesitation when that person I know says they are “fine,” so that I ask the follow-up question that gets the more honest answer. To have the patience to sit with the things that don’t have easy answers without spiraling forward or backward into them. To simply acknowledge
I
am
here.
Those three simple, monosyllabic words that contain multitudes.
This Week Last Year
We were chatting about waking up at 3:00 am stuck in loops about the past and future, which feels like an appropriate companion to the current week’s thoughts.
Apparently, the part of my brain that is capable of positive self-talk and logic and normalizing does not function between the hours of 1:00 am until it’s time to get up and make coffee and breakfast. As a protective mechanism, I’m typically asleep then. But on the occasion, I find myself awake, all I can say is that I am never as unsuccessful, terrible at my job, or as bad a friend/partner/family member as I am at 3:00 in the morning.
And there were some great tips for getting back to the present:
From AJ, “I practice the 4-7-8 breathing technique. Close your lips and inhale through your nose for a count of four. Hold your breath for a count of seven. Exhale completely through your mouth making a whoosh sound for a count of eight. This completes one cycle. I usually don't make it through more than 2 cycles before I have fallen back to sleep.”
From Karen, “my remedy is to whisper aloud to my monkey-mind, ‘There is nothing you can truly do about any of that at 3 AM. Rest is what you need.’ One deep breath, sighed out long like my cat before his nap, and I doze back off.”
Mindful Moment
Sharing this meditation in keeping with the theme of breath work:
Squirrel of the Week
This little squirrel lives in my office and he tagged along with me on vacation this year. The plan was for him to share a little travelogue with my colleagues when I got back, but I haven’t quite gotten that together yet—so please enjoy this selection from the yet to be published, Ralph’s Big Adventure:
I’d love to know what you are here means to you?
What a beautiful meditation - thank you. I am here to overcome fear.