I’m a bit sad and lonely. Half of my friend circle has moved away between October and today. And not we-can-visit-on-the-weekends moved away; Colorado and France moved away. Although I’m extremely friendly and this surprises anyone I share it with, I have a hard time actually making friends. It takes me a long time to feel comfortable enough with someone to consider them a true friend, so when it happens, I hold those relationships very dear. The last five to seven years, I finally felt like I had a true core group of friends, but now we’re spread all around the globe.
That is really hard. There is a grief in the loss of proximity of your friends-- it's so important to talk about that. I really relate on your point about being really friendly but taking a long time to make closer friends. It takes me some time to have the deeper more vulnerable conversations that make those close, strong, ties. Thanks so much for sharing. Holding space for you and hoping that the emptiness will start to refill (even if slowly).
I'm tired. But I'm trying to honor these last days of hibernation before spring is here and my mind wakes up instead of demanding it wakes up sooner. My practice to pause is a long, slow walk in the evening, without podcasts in my ears, just noticing sights and sounds, or even just my breath as it plays in counterpart to the squawks of the ducklings at the lake. Sometimes it's choosing go to the sauna at the gym to wind down instead of doing a workout and then sitting in the sauna. And always, I'm just trying to move through this world with a grateful heart.
Your evening walks sound really lovely and mindful. I always find it's amazing what I notice when I'm not walking as a means of getting somewhere (meaning, not rushing off to work or a meeting) and also when I take the headphones out. Thanks for sharing this. I love the idea of honoring a hibernation period, as well.
I’m a bit sad and lonely. Half of my friend circle has moved away between October and today. And not we-can-visit-on-the-weekends moved away; Colorado and France moved away. Although I’m extremely friendly and this surprises anyone I share it with, I have a hard time actually making friends. It takes me a long time to feel comfortable enough with someone to consider them a true friend, so when it happens, I hold those relationships very dear. The last five to seven years, I finally felt like I had a true core group of friends, but now we’re spread all around the globe.
That is really hard. There is a grief in the loss of proximity of your friends-- it's so important to talk about that. I really relate on your point about being really friendly but taking a long time to make closer friends. It takes me some time to have the deeper more vulnerable conversations that make those close, strong, ties. Thanks so much for sharing. Holding space for you and hoping that the emptiness will start to refill (even if slowly).
I'm tired. But I'm trying to honor these last days of hibernation before spring is here and my mind wakes up instead of demanding it wakes up sooner. My practice to pause is a long, slow walk in the evening, without podcasts in my ears, just noticing sights and sounds, or even just my breath as it plays in counterpart to the squawks of the ducklings at the lake. Sometimes it's choosing go to the sauna at the gym to wind down instead of doing a workout and then sitting in the sauna. And always, I'm just trying to move through this world with a grateful heart.
PS apparently I have two substack accounts now? Oopsie. Anyhoodle. This is me. xxoo
Aw! Two of you is better than one! xoxo
Your evening walks sound really lovely and mindful. I always find it's amazing what I notice when I'm not walking as a means of getting somewhere (meaning, not rushing off to work or a meeting) and also when I take the headphones out. Thanks for sharing this. I love the idea of honoring a hibernation period, as well.