I Will Sit Down & Create Something . . .

Just as soon as all these other 583 things on my to-do list are done

Have you ever had the experience of having something you really enjoy doing, yet finding it difficult to actually sit down and do it? For example, let’s say you are a writer, but when it’s time to sit down at the computer and write, it suddenly seems really important to alphabetize the spices in your pantry. Or you are a baker, but you feel the need to fold those towels that have been sitting in the dryer for a week before starting on that cake design. You’re a designer and have an idea for a hand-lettered card that would be really fun, but you feel that it’s imperative to get the oil changed in your car right this moment.

Why do we do this?

If our creative work brings us joy, why, when it’s time to do it, can we suddenly think of every mundane deferred task or errand we haven’t done in the last three months? Why is it so hard to just DO it?

This putting off of the creative work is rooted in two things:

• The idea that doing things you enjoy is a reward for getting everything else done. All the daily life stuff needs to be wrapped up: dishes washed, meals prepped, laundry folded, cars inspected, bills paid. In addition, the to-do list from the other job needs to be completed and checked off. Once all this is done, then, and only then, will it be okay to give in to the enjoyable creative work.

• Our old friend, fear. There’s no danger in reorganizing the spices in your pantry. Likely, no one will ever see them, and if they do, they would probably just be impressed with your organizational skills. But the essay you write, the pie you make for a client, the greeting card you mock up and post on Etsy—someone consumes those. Someone makes a decision about their value and whether to click buy or like. People could even leave a comment on them and tell you how terrible they are. There is risk, and it’s scary.

So what to do about this? How can you get everything tied up in a neat bow before you can really dig into that creative project that’s calling to you? How do you get rid of the fear?

The solution for both is to realize that you can’t do either of those things, and you must create anyway.

The to-do list will never be done. Not the one at the job. Not the one at home. You’ll just be waiting and waiting and waiting as you check one thing off and another gets added to the bottom. And if it’s never going to be done, then you might as well carve out some time to work on the creative work that brings you joy. The outcome of that task list is the same no matter what. But waiting for all that other stuff to be done to reward yourself with the creative work could mean never getting the creative work OR the to-do list done. Creativity is not a reward for the mundane. You don’t have to earn it. You can prioritize it over and in spite of all those other things.

You can’t get rid of fear. You might be able to dull its screaming voice, but it’s always going to be there whispering in your ear that your work isn’t good enough, smart enough, or delicious enough to be shared. It means well. It’s trying to protect you from the sting of judgment that comes from putting your work in the world. The trick is to be afraid and do it anyway. So when fear tries to thwart your creativity before you even sit down to make the thing, it isn’t about waiting for it to go away, but about moving forward amidst it.

This solution to create anyway is simultaneously simple and infinitely difficult. Like all mindset shifts, it’s so easy to read and think, “Yes, that is logical, it makes total sense, I’ve got it.” And yet the grooves of thinking differently are so well-worn that you’ll find yourself standing there with the cayenne pepper in your hand, wondering whether it should be filed under C for cayenne or P for pepper before you even realize you’re doing it.

But it starts with recognizing the behavior and putting that spice bottle back in its out-of-alphabetical-order spot in the pantry and sitting down to do the creative thing despite the undone to-do list and in the midst of your fear.

And then doing it again.

And again.

And again.

Until this new pattern starts to wear its own grooves.

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Community Conversations

Lots of great conversations in the comments on my last longer-form post here about congruence:

• Great thoughts from

  Joan Fernandez
  (
  Digging in with Joan Fernandez
  ) about "gap years" and how maybe they don't have to be only for twenty-somethings.

• A book recommendation for Jennifer Breheny Wallace's NEVER ENOUGH from Sally Clements.

• A connection to Glennon Doyle's description of integrity as "when your outside actions match your inside values or voice" from

  Leah Ferguson
  (
  One Vignette
  )

And over on the Things of Beauty Chat thread last week:

• Katie Sadler
  (
  Sparks
  ) is celebrating baking bread in all its delicious sense of accomplishment glory.

• And

  Regina G Beach
  (
  Nourish
  ) is sharing her first painting on canvas in years — a bright, beautiful iris.

Huge thank you to everyone who shows up to make these community discussions rich, delicious, and beautiful.

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Mindful Moment

I really appreciated the moment of mindfulness at the top of this post from

Jandra Sutton

. It's a great reminder that we can pause and meditate on nature, even if we are not currently in a natural environment.

Need a break? Open this.

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Squirrel of the Week

Imagine my delight when I flipped the page of the calendar in my office to February and discovered this:

Calendar courtesy of Virginia Dept. of Wildlife Resources.

(And yes, I realize that I have a paper calendar hanging on a dry erase calendar. Look, sometimes there are things you don't need permanently stuck to the wall by previous office occupants, and you just make the best of it.)

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Do you struggle with procrastinating on doing your creative work? What's behind it: a reward mentality, fear, or something else entirely? I would love to hear your thoughts in the comments. (Also does that cayenne pepper go under C or P?)